Overjoyed one day, I can’t stop smiling –
The next, I can barely stop myself from crying.
What path can I take so it can be reconciling?
My mind can be great and then – terrifying.
The battle that’s been waged for so long now,
Only can hold the hope that it’ll one day end.
Taking each day as it comes, keeping my vow –
Fears and doubts, even I don’t fully comprehend.
The promise I made not too long ago,
Not to let the darkness overcome –
Or seep into my soul until it overflows.
Wanting, hoping to feel anything but numb.
It’s so complicated to understand or realize
That this isn’t something to just get over.
Surely, one day there will be a sweet compromise
And these thoughts will have their closure.
Until that day does come, I will hold hope
That I will make it through and continue to fight.
Adjusting, finding ways that I can cope,
Breaking through the darkness and into the light.
© Susan Reed
For more on my journey and previous blogs about seeking help with facing my anxiety problems, check out these posts below: