Adulthood, Blogging, Broken Heart, Daily Prompt, Growing Up, Love, Memories, Poetry, Silence, Topic Ideas, Wordpress, Writing

Flawed Heart

Smiles and laughter realized again

Deep in my soul, they still exist

Despite the heartbreak and pain

I remember what I dismissed.

 

Wordsmith of stories and poems

Decades spent writing them all –

Conveying different emotions –

One second up high, the next I fall.

 

Did you happen to notice what was missing?

Decades spent, yes – but two years lost…

Icy wall built tall and began dismissing

Anyone who dare try to force it to defrost.

 

Not fully prepared to trust once more

But the thought is there and gives me pause –

Is this something I should explore?

You see, I wonder these things because…

 

The questions run through my mind so fast –

What if he sees the cracks behind the smile?

The flaws that I hold are truly vast

In the end, that’s why I was cast in exile.

 

Those years I spent alone have been worthwhile…

I have learned to love myself again

And I’m not some creature absolutely vile

Who deserves to be look upon with disdain.

 

I can see that I am worth loving

But the question is still buried deep…

You’ve been patient though I’ve been shoving

And my defenses are starting to seep…

 

If I let my guard down, can you promise me?

Please, say that you can and mean it true…

Be patient and hear me when I plea –

Don’t break the trust I want to give to you.

 

Yes, I want to love again but am terrified

I want to let you in and then I run –

Hiding in the corner and the tears I’ve cried

Keeping my pain concealed from everyone.

 

Oh, they know that my heart was broken

And there was pain to deal with on my own

So many things I’ve left unspoken…

None of those things, you could’ve known.

 

Waves of white pain are mostly what I feel

Please, give me a little more time?

I’ve had two years but I’m not completely healed..

I need to be careful of who I give this heart of mine.

 

© Susan M. Moore

 

 

 

 

 

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